Quiz// What Type of Festival Camper Are You?

WORDS: Brett Fillmore

You can learn a lot about someone sharing a festival campsite with them. Discover the truth about your festival camping aptitude in 10 easy questions, Teen Vogue style.

When it comes time to eat, you:
A) wait in a 30-minute line for a $19 food truck hamburger
B) construct a half decent sandwich from fresh food in a chilled cooler
C) grill up some pre-marinated chops, with side dishes
D) scavenge for roots and berries (alternate method: substance diet)

Your plan for nighttime shelter looks like:
A) some kind of tarp and hammock apparatus
B) a sturdy tent and cozy sleeping bag
C) a well-vestibuled sleeping tent and designated party tent
D) trying to get laid

When it rains, you:
A) punch your arms through a garbage bag and tough it out
B) take the occasion to wear those Hunters you shelled out for
C) bust out your poncho and fan-favourite umbrella hat
D) take your shirt off, for some reason

Your drinking plan mostly involves:
A) $10 beers in the venue
B) a cooler full of your favourite king cans
C) cocktail delights consisting of 4 or more ingredients, with garnishes
D) warm, ultra-cheap beer that might as well be prison hooch

When trying to find your campsite at the end of the night, you:
A) stumble around, swearing that last lane looked familiar
B) look for landmarks you recognize with a shrewd sense of direction
C) easily spot the lit totem towering above your site
D) pass out in the grass

Your neighbours:
A) are kind of sick of you asking to borrow a lighter
B) are your new best friends
C) better like to get down, because you’re going all night
D) are probably plotting to maim or possibly kill you

When something breaks at the campsite, you:
A) let it go, man
B) bust out that duct tape and wire, Red Green style
C) miraculously pull a replacement out of your bag
D) shrug it off because now it’s in the same condition as basically everything else

When you’re relaxing at your campsite, you’re sitting on:
A) the cooler
B) a classic foldable chair, just like a backyard barbecue
C) one of these mawfuggin’ things
D) the same patch of grass where you accidentally spilled all that ketchup earlier today

Your shower plans involve:
A) hoping that it rains
B) buying a shower pass
C) bringing your own swank solar shower
D) abstaining

Your campsite good times situation looks like:
A) a bunch of people trying to convince Jeremy to put away that stupid kazoo
B) jamming to great tunes, playing flippy cup
C) a full-on dance party, obviously including themed costumes, and somehow complete with rope lights, decks, and speakers
D) Trainspotting

Tabulate your score according to the following:
Every A answer is worth 2 points
Every B answer is worth 3 points
Every C answer is worth 4 points
Every D answer is worth 1 point


35 or more points – You are legend. This is clearly not your first rodeo, and everyone knows it. Consider taking a padawan under your wing so your robust expertise can be passed on to future generations. Shine on.

25-35 points – You are a classic festival-goer—capable, prepared, but not quite expert. You’re maximizing your experience, and see no need to go over the top. Feel confident in your skills, as the vast majority of other experienced people in your festival campground are doing it just like you are.

15-25 points – You are a festival camping n00b. Maybe this is your first time or maybe you got last-minute tickets, but you’re not doing yourself many favours. The good news is that it won’t take much shrewd planning to up your game. You definitely have it in you.

15 or less points – You are a total disaster. How did you even acquire a wristband?

1 Comment on Quiz// What Type of Festival Camper Are You?

  1. heimatkurve // July 6, 2017 at 11:33 pm // Reply

    Reblogged this on Pakbag® Blog.

1 Trackback / Pingback

  1. Welcher Typ Festival Camper bist Du? – Pakbag® Blog

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